Wednesday 29 February 2012

February 29 | AA 12 Steps In Action | Step 2 | 2012

February 29 | AA 12 Steps In Action | Step 2 | 2012 | Today's AA daily reflection: "all about brief moments of temptation and a higher power which restores me to sanity on a daily basis." I honestly cannot recollect the last temptation to drink alcohol. Where I live I am surrounded by markets, clubs and bars and houses stuffed to the gunwales with drink… But not in my house…



In my early days of recovery, I went to meetings of the Fellowship of Alcoholics Anonymous because I was frightened of drinking alcohol again. I would go to meetings morning noon and night. In London UK I could smell alcohol in the air. Nowadays I go to meetings because I simply like them and love the people who go. I don't keep alcohol in my house because I don't need it and I don't need be tempted, stubborn and defiant about having it around. It would be madness to think that my willpower is enough to stop me drinking. Indeed it is the very opposite, powerlessness which now provides the strength, experience and wisdom which works for one day…



I am restored to sanity on a daily basis and I know my vulnerabilities, my ego can find a thousand reasons to defy the obvious, that I'm an alcoholic in recovery and can be tempted at any time. I don't go to clubs and bars, because they are not fit for purpose, my purpose and my primary purpose to be sober and live a full life today…



The word God was never frightening to me, it is what many I encountered made God out to be for them. The God which took sides, which they heard from which they used to control me and my outlook. A bit like the bogeyman who was employed by those who wanted me to fear doing something those in power did not want me to do. Have freedom to make good and right choices for myself without imposing my will and others.





DonInLondon 2005-2011



I have found one video I made four years ago, and I will try and upload it to complete a full annual account of life in recovery one day at a time on my video blog. I'm writing this in 2012, my third leap year in recovery. What can I say about recovery over the years? That whoever we are, recovery works in the moment of now and just for today.



Our life experiences one day at a time our unique to ourselves, at the same time the twelve steps and twelve traditions are enduring principles which help me to be open, honest and willing as an individual, working with others in unity, service and recovery. And these principles are suggestions, not rules, not laws and regulations laid down to be followed in some "religious" way. Suggestions for living which make it possible to make the best choices open to me without damaging or hurting others.



It is a miracle to be alive one day at a time, whatever our circumstances because life is very fragile. So many things, people places impact on us daily and making sense of anything can be very difficult. And Scott Peck said, "life is difficult and when we accept that life is difficult it ceases to be a problem." And as they say in the Caribbean, "no problem!" We are never alone if we can ask the help, when the inner voice inside screams with fear or simply tells us we do not know something, we can always ask the help any time, anywhere and from anyone.



And I am always happy with the notion that God works through people, and I am also mindful that if God works through people, so can the devil who apparently is always in the detail…





AA Daily Reflection: ONE A.A. MIRACLE ~ Save for the brief moments of temptation the thought of drink has never returned; and at such times a great revulsion has risen up in him. Seemingly he could not drink even if he would. God had restored his sanity. Alcoholics Anonymous, p. 37



The word "God" was frightening to me when I first saw it associated with A.A.'s Twelve Steps. Having tried all the means I could to stop drinking, I found that it was not possible for me to sustain that desire over a period of time. Yet, how could I believe in a "God" that had allowed me to sink to the deep despair that engulfed me--whether drinking or dry? The answer was in finally admitting that it might be possible for me to know the mercy of a Power greater than myself who could grant me sobriety contingent on my willingness to "come to believe." By finally admitting that I was one among many, and by following the example of my sponsor and other A.A. members in practicing faith I did not have, my life has been given meaning, direction and purpose.



Step 2 Reading Video Link:







"Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity"



-/-

Tuesday 28 February 2012

February 28 | AA 12 Steps In Action | Step 2 | 2012

February 28 | AA 12 Steps In Action | Step 2 | 2012 | Today's AA daily reflection: "what? No president?" Not only was I sick and tired of being sick and tired when it came to alcohol, I was sick and tired of everybody's opinion of me and sick and tired of people telling me what to do when it came to my drinking and my life. Indeed my life would have ended if I got any more advice from people who didn't understand and looked down on me as a hopeless failure…



And coming into Fellowship, absolutely confused and bamboozled and not able to cope with reality in any shape or form it was touch and go whether I could listen long enough to realise there was a solution to my alcoholism. People did not trip over themselves to offer me advice or tell me what to do. They simply said I might benefit from listening, ask questions and stop beating myself up for being a failure. But there are many who with good intention become ingrained in telling others what to do, and wanting to lead in our society. We are but trusted servants…



Rarely have I seen a person fail who has thoroughly understood the true nature of Fellowship and Alcoholics Anonymous. And it takes time to realise the whole message and the suggestions are about liberating and freeing us from our addiction to alcohol. And helping us make free choices and good decisions about how to live life. With humility we learn how to be open, honest and willing to change as life changes and in the Fellowship of Alcoholics Anonymous, work together in unity service and recovery… No rules, no laws and no regulations, and no president!



I may disagree with decisions my home group makes or in my case the many home group's I belong to. But if the decision is made by the group conscience I can abide by that decision or move along to another group. I will have my right to challenge any decision and call a group conscience. But if I cannot persuade my fellows, I need let go to my view of the group process and activities. And I need ask myself why I am out of touch with my fellows…



I like this quote in the AA daily reflection, "no treasurer can compel the payment of dues" and so often I see an attempt by the "committee" to cover the rent religiously each week, the regulars feel aggrieved, the newcomer fears being ripped off, and I just feel pissed off. When the group's finances are in recession, nothing kills off the economy faster than bad news and deficits. Five loaves and two fishes, fed the five thousand with an attitude of gratitude…



DonInLondon 2005-2011



When told that our Society has no president having authority to govern it, no treasurer who can compel the payment of any dues... our friends gasp and exclaim, “This simply can’t be ...” A weekend where tradition two was discussed, "we are trusted servants" I smile at myself, my outlook is simply one of many...



Into the fabric of recovery from alcoholism are woven the Twelve Steps and the Twelve Traditions, steps to be open honest and willing to learn, traditions to live unity service and recovery...



Old Timers support Newcomers - Newcomers support Old Timers ~ Jim Rohn "A good objective of leadership is to help those who are doing poorly to do well and to help those who are doing well to do even better." -/- Same size humans, veterans or greenhorns, making progress on day at a time..



In Fellowship we are interdependent - not codependent, lead as needed ~ Nelson Mandela "It is better to lead from behind and to put others in front, especially when you celebrate victory when nice things occur. We take the front line when there is danger. Then people will appreciate our leadership." -/- We lead when asked, we share as we may, hope always for a sober day..



We - Unique and Authentic, not special and different? Peter Drucker "No institution can possibly survive if it needs geniuses to lead it. It must be organized in such a way as to be able to get along under a leadership of average human beings." Real people living and making Spiritual and Emotional Progress in Fellowship



Honest - Open - Willing - sober works leading by example ~ Dwight D. Eisenhower "The supreme quality for leadership is unquestionably integrity. Without it, no real success is possible, no matter whether it is in an army, or in an office." -/- In fellowship we are all leaders and equal in experience, strength and hope...



AA Daily Reflection: WHAT? NO PRESIDENT? ~ FEBRUARY 28, When told that our Society has no president having authority to govern it, no treasurer who can compel the payment of any dues. . . . our friends gasp and exclaim, “This simply can’t be . . .” TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 132



When I finally made my way to A.A., I could not believe that there was no treasurer to “compel the payment of dues.” I could not imagine an organization that didn’t require monetary contributions in return for a service. It was my first and, thus far, only experience with getting “something for nothing.” Because I did not feel used or conned by those in A.A., I was able to approach the program free from bias and with an open mind. They wanted nothing from me. What could I lose? I thank God for the wisdom of the early founders who knew so well the alcoholic’s disdain for being manipulated.



Step 2 Reading Video Link:







"Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity"



-/-


Monday 27 February 2012

February 27 | AA 12 Steps In Action | Step 2 | 2012

February 27 | AA 12 Steps In Action | Step 2 | 2012 | Today's AA daily reflection: "no single leader, we are trusted servants working together in fellowship." The readable quote in AA daily reflections says, "a loving God as he may express himself in the group conscience." Experience, strength and hope is key in the group conscience. Decision-making is by vote on matters to do with how the group works within fellowship. Democratic and difficult, just as life is day by day in recovery…



Sometimes we might want our own way when it comes to how a group works and operates. We have the right to express our view, and to put forward our suggestions which can then be voted in or out. Good ideas which are voted in become part of the group's process and ideas which do not have support are let go. As trusted servants, we do not lay down rules, laws or regulations. We abide to groups coming into existence for people with a desire to stop drinking. Trusted servants working together and everyone with the opportunity to contribute as they may and can on a daily basis…



If there had been rules, laws and regulations to impose on people who have a desire to stop drinking, the wisdom is the fellowship would have disappeared long ago. Which built on tradition one, no one in Alcoholics Anonymous can tell another what to do and at the same time we do work in unity, service and recovery to keep sober day by day. I have deep gratitude for these traditions, traditions one and two and how they not only work within the fellowship, they work in my day-to-day living, the application changing as life changes in the moment of now…



With step two, a higher power working through people and tradition two again based on the wisdom of the many being applicable in all conditions of life makes it possible for me to keep right sized on a daily basis. I don't need to know the answers, because often I don't even know what the questions are until life happens. All the twelve steps and all the twelve traditions work as we experience life day by day…



DonInLondon 2005-2011



Into the fabric of recovery from alcoholism are woven the Twelve Steps and the Twelve Traditions, steps to be open honest and willing to learn, traditions to live unity service and recovery...



Let go fantasy, live in reality has been the key message for me today in both meetings, one at "the hut" in Chelsea this lunchtime, and "after nines" in Belgravia tonight. And to see people I love okay with life today. Sober every feeling is real, balanced or at extremes fitting the experience we are having...





What is spiritual? As each of us comes to understand spiritual today. Some say, the ability to cope with life [an Archbishop said this] and what matters for me is we do find our spiritual connection, whatever it may be to the good for everyone. I feel it need be a personal understanding similar enough so we may keep learning from each other... and we can love, be loved back and useful in the ever present imperfectly perfect moment of now, where everything happens always...



No pulpits in fellowship, simply chairs ~ Mary Douglas "The natural response of the bleeding deacons is to build a strong moral wall against the outside. This is where the world starts to be painted in black and white, saints inside, and sinners outside the wall." -/- Old timers know there are no moral walls



A bridge to spiritual living, needs met, wants forgotton ~ Mohandas Gandhi "Man falls from the pursuit of the ideal of plan living and high thinking the moment he wants to multiply his daily wants. Man's happiness really lies in contentment." From deserving a life, into acceptance of life on life's terms...



Sponsorship requires fidelity and adhering to our primary purpose, sobriety ~ Helen Keller "Many persons have a wrong idea of what constitutes true happiness. It is not attained through self-gratification but through fidelity to a worthy purpose." All about inclusion freedom of choice and love...





Sponsors are humble and in service as listening posts, sounding boards, step guides to emotional and spiritual sobriety. Sponsors don't want to control you, want your money, to be bought dinner, to be known, or want their washing done. Sponsors are equal and need be awake when hearing step five, and never judge your faith...



as a sponsor can I conduct myself with humility, share experience, strength and hope of how the steps and traditions work in life, listen without judging, be a listening post, a sounding board? As a sponsor do I know what I can and cannot do. Do I foster or hinder spiritual growth today?



AA Daily Reflection: A UNIQUE STABILITY FEBRUARY 27, Where does A.A. get its direction? . . . These practical folk then read Tradition Two, and learn that the sole authority in A.A. is a loving God as He may express Himself in the group conscience. . . The elder statesman is the one who sees the wisdom of the group’s decision, who holds no resentment over his reduced status, whose judgment, fortified by considerable experience, is sound, and who is willing to sit quietly on the sidelines patiently awaiting developments. TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, pp. 132, 135



Into the fabric of recovery from alcoholism are woven the Twelve Steps and the Twelve Traditions. As my recovery progressed, I realized that the new mantle was tailor made for me. The elders of the group gently offered suggestions when change seemed impossible. Everyone’s shared experiences became the substance for treasured friendships. I know that the Fellowship is ready and equipped to aid each suffering alcoholic at all crossroads in life. In a world beset by many problems, I find this assurance a unique stability. I cherish the gift of sobriety. I offer my gratitude for the strength I receive in a Fellowship that truly exists for the good of all members.





Step 2 Reading Video Link:







"Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity"



-/-

Sunday 26 February 2012

February 26 | AA 12 Steps In Action | Step 2 | 2012

February 26 | AA 12 Steps In Action | Step 2 | 2012 | Today's AA daily reflection: "no ordinary success story." Fellowship, all about unity, service and recovery for everyone with a desire to stop drinking. A desire to stop drinking became the only criteria for including ourselves in fellowship. No rules, laws or regulations and there are no leaders who govern, we are all trusted servants with equal voice. Each group is autonomous within Fellowship and making decisions for themselves through group conscience and always in service, and with acceptance.



Unity, service and recovery works for us in the fellowship of Alcoholics Anonymous and in my life, having family, community and society values, which are consistent with fellowship values keeps me level headed and even handed contingent on my spiritual condition. The twelve steps help me daily with my spiritual condition: to be open and truthful, honest as best I can and willing to keep changing as life changes. I need to heed and listen to the wisdom of everyone around me so I may keep learning how to live and be a part of life...



Who wants to be a "one trick pony" only able to excel at one element in life? I know people talk about life balance yet we exult those who drive themselves toward one element of life, the most obvious being famous for one thing. I was talking to my sister a few moments ago about family matters, and the need to cherish and be kind. And how important it is for each person in the family to have their own identity and their own interests. Being good at one thing and driven addictively easily cuts a person off from the richness of our existence and the bigger world of now...



God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can and the wisdom to know the difference. What can I change today, and where is my serenity? It starts with being able to cope with reality and see and be interested in everything and being able to pick and choose interests and activities. All of which for me is rolled into unity, service and recovery. Plus life in general, family and friends and community and sharing a message and writing and photography and news and TV, the list is what it is ever-changing… Always with unconditional love, to love be loved back and useful in the moment of now…





DonInLondon 2005-2011



Courage to change, the theme this evening. From being stuck in the malady, to finding our solution one day at a time. I am thankful to be alive and part of a fellowship where we help each other as best we can. Sober we have a chance to live life as it is, real and deal with life on life's terms... change the things we can and wisdom to know the difference.



Step 2 "Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity"



AA Daily Reflection: NO ORDINARY SUCCESS STORY ~ FEBRUARY 26, A.A. is no success story in the ordinary sense of the word. It is a story of suffering transmuted, under grace, into spiritual progress. AS BILL SEES IT, p. 35



Upon entering A.A. I listened to others talk about the reality of their drinking: loneliness, terror and pain. As I listened further, I soon heard a description of a very different kind–the reality of sobriety. It is a reality of freedom and happiness, of purpose and direction, and of serenity and peace with God, ourselves and others. By attending meetings, I am reintroduced to that reality, over and over. I see it in the eyes and hear it in the voices of those around me. By working the program I find the direction and strength with which to make it mine. The joy of A.A. is that this new reality is available to me.



Step 2 Reading Video Link:



"Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity"

-/-

Saturday 25 February 2012

February 25 | AA 12 Steps In Action | Step 2 | 2012

February 25 | AA 12 Steps In Action | Step 2 | 2012 | Today's AA's daily reflection: "failure and success depends on our outlook." We seem to live in a world where pass and fail are with us from early childhood. Upgrading and downgrading, and most often as we measure we are degrading rather than building. When it comes to human development, nothing is wasted if we have the right outlook…



A recent British Prime Minister before taking office used to say "education, education and education" as his slogan before being elected. Learning is life long and if we take each situation where ever we are as an opportunity to keep on learning about life, what we can do and what we cannot do as we go along, we keep on building and learning every single day. Best of all we keep learning how to love, be loved back and useful today…



Truth love and wisdom! The more we can see the truth of our situation, what seems unacceptable becomes very acceptable. Truth is the building block of life and it is better to find truth rather than live to falsehoods. Love certainly does make the world go round and very worthwhile, so learning love, how to love without conditions and be loved back especially without conditions makes life worthwhile. And the wisdom? Is always growing day by day…



Humility is a keyword and a key action in recovery. For me, I just keep learning and understanding life daily. One of the most useful experiences in recovery has been learning how to say no to what is redundant or simply not what I want to do. At the same time we all have "need to do actions" and often obligations to those around us. Learning the difference, the needs of others and my own needs versus wants, "I want" is often wanting too much from people, places and things which serves no purpose ultimately in my life or theirs, whoever they may be…



DonInLondon 2005-2011



Through experience and learning with humility, growth started, followed by gratitude. Yes, then came peace of mind — living in and sharing sobriety



"After Eights" a great meeting, new secretary, brilliant chair. Our emotional and spiritual fellowship. Emotional is feeling our feelings, spiritual is living and coping with reality. When our feelings match reality and we are sober, happy or sad we experience serenity in the moment of now! Wonderful



Start and Restart our days.. New actions, new attitudes, new behaviour.. ~ Andre Gide "Everything has been said before, but since nobody listens we have to keep going back and beginning all over again." -/- Practice makes for progress as sober-sanity develops, what we do differently, not others!



Sanity returns as we put our action into new life experiences, slow slow, quick quick slow ~ Benjamin Franklin "Experience keeps a dear school, but we fools will learn in no other way." -/- Look back at the madness, don't stare, today is where we are..action to the good of living is key ..



Sober, we develop a deeper understanding of ourselves and others and it takes time.. ~ Randolph Bourne "Few people even scratch the surface, much less exhaust the contemplation of their own experience." -/- New ways of living take on meaning and substance, we feel different and behave differently..



We might have wished it different, now we understand from torments to acceptance and changing, always putting in action ~ Auguste Rodin "Nothing is a waste of time if we use the experience wisely." -/- Consider our behaviour not that of others, change ourselves is key.. always in our action!



AA Daily Reflection: THE CHALLENGE OF FAILURE ~ FEBRUARY 25, In God’s economy, nothing is wasted. Through failure, we learn a lesson in humility which is probably needed, painful though it is. AS BILL SEES IT, p. 31



How thankful I am today, to know that all my past failures were necessary for me to be where I am now. Through much pain came experience and, in suffering, I became obedient. When I sought God, as I understand Him, He shared His treasured gifts. Through experience and obedience, growth started, followed by gratitude. Yes, then came peace of mind — living in and sharing sobriety.





Step 2 Reading Video Link:







"Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity"

Friday 24 February 2012

February 24 | AA 12 Steps In Action | Step 2 | 2012

February 24 | AA 12 Steps In Action | Step 2 | 2012 | Today's AA daily reflection: "understanding emotional and spiritual life" when I forget that the twelve steps are all about my feelings fitting what is going on in the moment of now, I am lost in my history or often dreaming of the future. Whoever "they" are, they often say, "look back don't stare" and "keep it in the moment" and simply know the only place where sanity can be restored is today…



In recent meetings, many references to knowing we cannot control the way we feel, at the same time our thinking and actions are quite a different matter. Feelings are always developing about our situation and sometimes and hopefully often they are the wonderful feelings that life is good. Then in a split second, feelings can go up and down as life throws new information, people places and things evoking anything and everything. From heart stopping and heart thumping joy to heart stopping and heart thumping sadness. And anything in between! Our feelings impact on how we think and act and that is where we have choice moment by moment…



And the AA daily reflection, all about an attitude of gratitude, can be a challenge in itself. Being able to feel what is going on in my life in the moment of now, is a revelation. I used to walk away from situations and then feel good or bad about them because I had suppressed my feelings for so long. Even when life is painful I do have an attitude of gratitude, because I feel the pain and learn from it, usually what I can and cannot do and the wisdom to know the difference more or less in the moment of now…



Last nights "after eight" meeting, sensational for me! Why? Listening and hearing the truth about recovery, what it is like after eight years and more. At the same time a one day programme for people living one day at a time. A crowded room of one day people living in one day with a background of of least a thousand years of experience, strength and hope and wisdom of what we can and cannot do just in one day… Now that is a higher power helping me and restoring me to "sanity" and freedom of choice and action each and every day…



DonInLondon 2005-2011



Happy today? Me, a type 1 insulin dependent injecting diabetic, with clinical depression, diabetic neuropathy in back and limbs, broken bones in foot not healing, had lumps in groin now healing and nearly gone, tinitus, insomnia, two slipped dics L4 & L5, a trapped nerve and left foot drop. I am happy, sober and living reality today!



I’m alive, I’m sober, and I’m a Fellow in Alcoholics Anonymous. I try to live an “attitude of gratitude” experiencing reality. A fellow in fellowship helps me live life on life's terms, know how I am feeling, why and what I may do. Freedom of choice and changes are possible, just for today



The state of being grateful; warm and friendly feeling toward a benefactor; kindness awakened by a favor received; thankfulness



Attitude of gratitude - is in our daily actions, feelings and behaviour ~ John F. Kennedy "As we express our gratitude, we must never forget that the highest appreciation is not to utter words, but to live by them." -/- Lest we forget, actions speak louder than words..



Grateful for now, grateful for another step in potholes and puddles.. ~ Brian Tracy "To develop an attitude of gratitude, and give thanks for everything that happens to us, knowing that every step forward is a step toward achieving something bigger and better than our current situation.!" -/- Splish splash splosh..



Fellowship friends help us through the dark times and lighten our burdens ~ Albert Schweitzer "At times our own light goes out and is rekindled by a spark from another person. Each of us has cause to think with deep gratitude of those who have lighted the flame within us." -/- Sharing experience, strength and hope, a gift of providence..



All living is a two way street, we need include to be included, share and share alike ~ William Arthur Ward "Feeling gratitude and not expressing it is like wrapping a present and not giving it." give freely, expect nothing and forgive everything..



AA Daily Reflection: A THANKFUL HEART ~ FEBRUARY 24, Try to hold fast to the truth that a full and thankful heart cannot entertain great conceits. When brimming with gratitude, one’s heartbeat must surely result in outgoing love, the finest emotion that we can ever know. AS BILL SEES IT, p. 37



My sponsor told me that I should be a grateful alcoholic and always have “an attitude of gratitude”–that gratitude was the basic ingredient of humility, that humility was the basic ingredient of anonymity, and that “anonymity was the spiritual foundation of all our Traditions, ever reminding us to place principles before personalities.” As a result of his guidance, I start every morning on my knees, thanking God for three things: I’m alive, I’m sober, and I’m a member of Alcoholics Anonymous. Then I try to live an “attitude of gratitude” and thoroughly enjoy another twenty-four hours of the A.A. way of life. A.A. is not something I joined; it’s something I live.



Step 2 Reading Video Link:







"Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity"



-/-

Thursday 23 February 2012

February 23 | AA 12 Steps In Action | Step 2 | 2012

February 23 | AA 12 Steps In Action | Step 2 | 2012 | Today's AA daily reflection: "paradoxes and growing pains." Alcoholics Anonymous, all about emotional and spiritual living. Or often described by me as my feelings fit the reality of my situation in the moment of now. If life is calm, my feelings and thinking and actions are likely to be calm. If life is at an extreme, my feelings and thinking and actions may be extreme. All good in the moment of now. It's not about suppression or hiding from the truth, it's dealing with the truth and coping with reality and just for a moment, a minute an hour and in this one day…



For years I have no clue what it was to be a complete emotional and spiritual individual. Only half my feelings seemed to be allowed and so half my feelings were hidden away and not developed, and the other half became overdeveloped to compensate. So I was not an all-rounder in the emotional and spiritual departments of life. Being restored to sanity on any given day can be contingent on asking the help from any source around me. And these days, anything in this world can be a higher power in the moment of now. If God works through people, all well and good and with a good conscience to help me and that inner voice of conscience my decision-making and actions improve day by day…



Sometimes though, we go two steps forward and one step backward or two steps backward and one step forward. Why not? Sometimes like in my life I had to start over from what seemed like the very beginning. And these days whatever happens because life is difficult we can go back to a new beginning simply because that is the reality of our situation. Nothing is lost in this economy unless we choose to see it as waste. Human life, it has always been this way and the more flexible we are in a more rounded we are in our emotional and spiritual outlook, that anything can happen, the more likely we change as life changes…



The only guarantee in life is that if I am sober I stand more chance to cope on a daily basis knowing what my feelings are and coping with each change in my life as it occurs. Better choices made and free choices often with discussion, often with a pause to reflect and very often completely spontaneous and in the moment… I don't have to second-guess everything any more, unless there is imminent danger or a risky situation in which case as my mother would say, "keep a sharp look out!"



DonInLondon 2005-2011



Happy truth becomes real, we fear less and have faith in being able to love with an open heart. Wonderful to express what sober life offers. Whether life is happy or sad, we are able to share our truth, express what is happening in the moment and in the day. We need never fear our real life experiences when we are open and share them. We live reality today...



Such is the paradox of A.A. regeneration: strength arising out of complete defeat and weakness, the loss of one’s old life as a condition for finding a new one ~ A.A. COMES OF AGE



The state of being grateful; warm and friendly feeling toward a benefactor; kindness awakened by a favor received; thankfulness



Attitude of gratitude - is in our daily actions, feelings and behaviour ~ John F. Kennedy "As we express our gratitude, we must never forget that the highest appreciation is not to utter words, but to live by them." -/- Lest we forget, actions speak louder than words..



Grateful for now, grateful for another step in potholes and puddles.. ~ Brian Tracy "To develop an attitude of gratitude, and give thanks for everything that happens to us, knowing that every step forward is a step toward achieving something bigger and better than our current situation.!" -/- Splish splash splosh..



Fellowship friends help us through the dark times and lighten our burdens ~ Albert Schweitzer "At times our own light goes out and is rekindled by a spark from another person. Each of us has cause to think with deep gratitude of those who have lighted the flame within us." -/- Sharing experience, strength and hope, a gift of providence..



All living is a two way street, we need include to be included, share and share alike ~ William Arthur Ward "Feeling gratitude and not expressing it is like wrapping a present and not giving it." give freely, expect nothing and forgive everything..



AA Daily Reflection: MYSTERIOUS PARADOXES ~ FEBRUARY 23, Such is the paradox of A.A. regeneration: strength arising out of complete defeat and weakness, the loss of one’s old life as a condition for finding a new one. A.A. COMES OF AGE, p. 46



What glorious mysteries paradoxes are! They do not compute, yet when recognized and accepted, they reaffirm something in the universe beyond human logic. When I face a fear, I am given courage; when I support a brother or sister, my capacity to love myself is increased; when I accept a pain as part of the growing experience of life, I realize a greater happiness; when I look at my dark side, I am brought into new light; when I accept my vulnerabilities and surrender to a Higher Power, I am graced with unforeseen strength. I stumbled through the doors of A.A. in disgrace, expecting nothing from life, and I have been given hope and dignity. Miraculously, the only way to keep the gifts of the program is to pass them on.



Step 2 Reading Video Link:







"Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity"



-/-

Wednesday 22 February 2012

February 22 | AA 12 Steps In Action | Step 2 | 2012

February 22 | AA 12 Steps In Action | Step 2 | 2012 | Today's AA daily reflection: "all about guidance." I have a strong faith in being guided by any source of wisdom which comes into my life today. Is this a faith in a higher power? Most often to me it is listening to the collective wisdom of the many people I encounter in life on a daily basis. Wherever faith comes from, which helps develop solutions, and improve my experience, strength and hope is truly a gift and a source for me to acknowledge…



Our Fellowship, "forged on the anvils of experience," continues to be forged on the many anvils of the many in recovery. With humility and as individuals we can grow and develop our experience, strength and hope and collectively as humanity nothing stands still. Humanity is evolving as we are evolving as individuals, recovery and sobriety offers me the freedom to learn and the freedom to choose next steps and next actions in my life today…



Opinions and beliefs, we all have them and there are over seven billion people on the planet. Each of us with an outlook, growing and developing through time and experience. We all have our unique and authentic experience day by day, I found it best never to undermine others opinions and beliefs and hope that as I am respectful to the world, I hope the world and people I encounter may be respectful of my outlook to good conscience and good living today…



Over the decades I'm grateful that the founders of the Fellowship of Alcoholics Anonymous made it clear that there is no exclusion to anyone wishing to be a part of the Fellowship and the only requirement is a desire to stop drinking. No rules, no laws and regulations to exclude individuals. We are all trusted servants, each with our opinions and beliefs, and at the same time being respectful of each other's outlook even when it may feel disagreeable and wrong for us as individuals…



You are quite within your rights to follow your path, your religion and politics in the world which does not interfere with the rights of others, in line with the declaration of human rights by the United Nations. In Fellowship we are mindful not to tread on each other's toes and as the AA pledge reads, "I'm responsible when anyone anywhere reaches out the help, I want the hand of AA to be there and for that I'm responsible…" It may not be your hand or my hand today, the hope is there will be a hand in AA reaching out to offer help and when asked we will try to answer…



We all have an inner voice, and that inner voice is motivated by our personal traits and drives. From whatever source, be it a higher power, nature and providence I feel there is a moral code and I have a conscience to the good of life. Faith and belief in seeking solutions to the good of life and the good of everyone keeps me right sized in my outlook and my actions on a daily basis. Everyone contributes to life based on their beliefs and opinions on what they choose to do. Freedom of choice with a clear head and seeing the big picture and the possibilities to the good help guide me in my actions day by day…





DonInLondon 2005-2011



We are always unique and authentic individuals, living in the same day. Truth, love and wisdom are key to living. With humility we learn what works each day, that we are all interdependent and connected. Sober we have freedom to choose our path, we can change as life changes today...



Sober emotionally and spiritually our inner voice rings true to the good of living ~ Shakti Gawain "Every time you don't follow your inner guidance, you feel a loss of energy, loss of power, a sense of spiritual deadness." -/- Our inner voice informed by truth, love and listening to wisdom of others..



Our wisdom develops with an honest open and willing outlook, accepting and guided by the truth in front of us ~ Immanuel Kant "Immaturity is the incapacity to use one's intelligence without the guidance of another?" -/- Emotional and spiritual living is now, inclusive and enriched by experience and all we encounter..



Let go.. out of the madness of self will run riot, and let in the Truth, love and wisdom of others ~ Shakti Gawain "When I'm trusting and being myself as fully as possible, everything in my life reflects this by falling into place easily, often miraculously." Solutions come more easily as we include and seek help without fear..



Buddha "Just as treasures are uncovered from the earth, so virtue appears from good deeds, and wisdom appears from a pure and peaceful mind. To walk safely through the maze of human life, one needs the light of wisdom and the guidance of virtue."



Sober and with humility, if we behave to others as we would like them to behave towards us ~ Anais Nin ~ "Each contact with a human being is so rare, so precious, one should preserve it." -/- and have no expectations of them, then resentments and forgiveness keep us on the potholed intrepid path of destiny, it’s not what they do, it’s what we do that gets results…



Living in the solution, honest open and willing, newcomers.. ~ Anais Nin "Each friend represents a world in us, a world not born until they arrive, and it is only by this meeting that a new world is born." -/- We need love them as we cherish our closest friends and as we learn to love ourselves..



AA Daily Reflection: GUIDANCE ~ FEBRUARY 22, This means a belief in a Creator who is all power, justice, and love; a God who intends for me a purpose, a meaning, and a destiny to grow, however… haltingly, toward His own likeness and image. AS BILL SEES IT, p. 51



As I began to understand my own powerlessness and my dependence on God, as I understand Him, I began to see that there was a life which, if I could have it, I would have chosen for myself from the beginning. It is through the continuous work of the Steps and the life in the Fellowship that I’ve learned to see that there is truly a better way into which I am being guided. As I come to know more about God, I am able to trust His ways and His plans for the development of His character in me. Quickly or not so quickly, I grow toward His image and likeness...




Step 2 Reading Video Link:







"Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity"

Tuesday 21 February 2012

February 21 | AA 12 Steps In Action | Step 2 | 2012

February 21 | AA 12 Steps In Action | Step 2 | 2012 | Today's AA daily reflection: "we are part of something bigger than us again!" The horror at the end of my drinking, isolated and alone and hoping that after each bout of drinking I would not wake up was a constant way of thinking. And only when I thought it could get no worse and I was still alive did I realise that being at the end of my drinking life was the start and opportunity to join in life again with nothing and no expectations or attitude of deserving anything. Being able to join a Fellowship which could help me be included in life again made me feel suspicious and hopeful and doubtful, with just a glimmer of a chance…



If I haven't heard early on, "take the cotton wool out of your ears and put it in your mouth" I doubt I would have listened and kept on listening to what was going on. From a small glimmer to a bright light took a while in my recovery. And the idea of a higher power being the wisdom of the many sharing experience strength and hope in the rooms of AA took hold. If they could recover, I could and all I needed to do was join in and get to bed each day without a drink...



Society seems to have taught us how to judge each other and form prejudice in all manner of human activities. Addiction and alcoholism is often seen as a self inflicted wound by those who do not have it, whatever the addiction and worse by those who do have it and cannot get out of it. Self prejudice kills most people, and self prejudice stops us from getting help when we most need it. Those most afflicted are often the harshest critics before recovery. And society still makes people feel shameful and guilty about illness…



If I could have pulled myself together, I would have…





DonInLondon 2005-2011



When I first came to A.A., I decided that “they” were very nice people–perhaps a little naive, a little too friendly, but basically decent, earnest people (with whom I had nothing in common). I saw “them” at meetings –after all, that was where “they” existed - As Bill Sees It



Restored and included in fellowship we are connected in all elements of life ~ Albert Schweitzer "Love . . . includes fellowship in suffering, in joy and in effort." -/- We need work it, to be worth it, a balance in humility and esteem..



Out of isolation into inclusion, a shock to our outlook, we are part of life again ~ Albert Schweitzer "We don't live in a world all our own. Our brothers and sisters are here, too." -/- It was never all about me..





Unity, service and recovery, we can be a part of living ~ Emily Dickinson "If I can stop one heart from breaking, I shall not live in vain; If I can ease one life the aching, Or cool one pain, I shall not live in vain." -/- No one human more or less important than another, lest we forget..



Spiritual encompasses all elements of living in reality ~ Simone de Beauvoir "One's life has value so long as one attributes value to the life of others, by means of love, friendship, and compassion." -/- We are responsible, when anyone, anywhere reaches out for help..



I do need to lean on the many in fellowship, and get help outside the fellowship when I am out of my depth. Experience has taught me the limits of what I can and cannot do. In fellowship as a non professional and as a citizen in daily life, when there is an emergency, we call emergency services and apply first aid as we may be trained...



AA Daily Reflection: I'M PART OF THE WHOLE ~ FEBRUARY 21, At once, I became a part–if only a tiny part–of a cosmos…. AS BILL SEES IT, p. 225



When I first came to A.A., I decided that “they” were very nice people–perhaps a little naive, a little too friendly, but basically decent, earnest people (with whom I had nothing in common). I saw “them” at meetings –after all, that was where “they” existed. I shook hands with “them” and, when I went out the door, I forgot about “them.” Then one day my Higher Power, whom I did not then believe in, arranged to create a community project outside of A.A., but one which happened to involve many A.A. members. We worked together, I got to know “them” as people. I came to admire “them,” even to like “them” and, in spite of myself, to enjoy “them.” “Their” practice of the program in their daily lives–not just talk at meetings –attracted me and I wanted what they had. Suddenly the “they” became “we.” I have not had a drink since.





Step 2 Reading Video Link:









"Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity"



-/-



Monday 20 February 2012

February 20 | AA 12 Steps In Action | Step 2 | 2012

February 20 | AA 12 Steps In Action | Step 2 | 2012 |Today's AA daily reflection: "feeling the highs and lows of life." By the end of my drinking days, I could hardly feel a thing beyond a dark and desolate pain which ached in my gut and all I wanted was oblivion. As a newcomer in Alcoholics Anonymous, the laughter of other people disturbed me immensely. I kept on going, 90 meetings in 90 days, they were not laughing at me, they were laughing at the absurdity of life and I joined in and began to laugh again...



A wonderful meeting yesterday, a newcomers meeting and our principal sharer began by saying stop thinking! I must say I loved what was shared, I promised myself I would go to this meeting a few hours earlier and in between I am sure I came up with 1000 reasons not to go. Even today some years in recovery I can still think my way out what is good for me rather than go with the feeling of what is good me…



I know if I really do ask myself every day, when I wake up, "how am I feeling?" "Why?" "And what can I do next?" Often I have no clue why I feel good, bad or simply indifferent… At the same time it's good to ask why and usually if I don't feel good, it's because I am hungry, angry, lonely or tired, or any combination or just one of those things. If I feel good, why not go to a meeting or make contact with another human being? If I feel hungry angry lonely or tired, I better make conscious contact with another human being and have a reality check…



A reality check for me is about my emotional and spiritual condition. Knowing what my feelings are and how able am I to cope with the reality of my situation right now. Feelings always influence my thinking and feelings are happening all the time whether I like them or not. So if I know what my feelings are doing, I have a chance to think about what next and aim toward a solution rather than a problem or making a problem worse. Actions can change my feelings and often the thinking part about what to do next is heavily influenced by the twelve steps and experience strength and hope shared in meetings of the fellowship…



Yesterday afternoon after the meeting I met with friends and friends relatives for what I thought was going to be tea and cakes, fun and laughter. It was more than that, I was fed dinner and coffee and numerous sorts of cakes! And the delight of good company, old friends, new friends all of us laughing together, telling true stories and me sharing "tall stories" and sometimes so gleeful I cannot tell the difference from where truth ends and fictions exaggerate the humour I share… To love and be loved back just as we may be with all our human idiosyncrasies is the best it can be…



DonInLondon 2005-2011



Came to believe that a power greater than us.. ~ Mark Twain "The more we explain it, the more we don't understand it." Truth, love and wisdom of others a good start, sometimes in defining we return to denial, there is purpose in everything...



I do need to lean on the many in fellowship, and get help outside the fellowship when I am out of my depth. Experience has taught me the limits of what I can and cannot do. In fellowship as a non professional and as a citizen in daily life, when there is an emergency, we call emergency services and apply first aid as we may be trained...



Ralph Waldo Emerson "Play out the game, act well your part, and if the gods have blundered, we will not."



The more we know the less we know ~ Mark Twain "The most interesting information comes from children, for they tell all they know and then stop." In the ever present moment we know what we know, then we learn more with an open mind...



Laughter and not taking ourselves too seriously, all the time! ~Joan Lunden "Holding on to anger, resentment and hurt only gives you tense muscles, a headache and a sore jaw from clenching your teeth. Forgiveness gives you back the laughter and the lightness in your life." -/- Forgive, forgive forgive...



In our fewllowship we we see the walking dead restored to sanity [some of the time..] Linda Ellerbee "I have always felt that laughter in the face of reality is probably the finest sound there is and will last until the day when the game is called on account of darkness. In this world, a good time to laugh is any time you can." Our gallows humour may seem insane to some, back from the brink we are lucky and laughter comes in time...



AA Daily Reflection: THE GIFT OF LAUGHTER ~ FEBRUARY 20, At this juncture, his A.A. sponsor usually laughs. TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 26



Before my recovery from alcoholism began, laughter was one of the most painful sounds I knew. I never laughed and I felt that anyone else’s laughter was directed at me! My self-pity and anger denied me the simplest of pleasures or lightness of heart. By the end of my drinking not even alcohol could provoke a drunken giggle in me. When my A.A. sponsor began to laugh and point out my self-pity and ego-feeding deceptions, I was annoyed and hurt, but it taught me to lighten up and focus on my recovery. I soon learned to laugh at myself and eventually I taught those I sponsor to laugh also. Every day I ask God to help me stop taking myself too seriously.





Step 2 Reading Video Link:









"Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity"



-/-


Sunday 19 February 2012

February 19 | AA 12 Steps In Action | Step 2 | 2012

February 19 | AA 12 Steps In Action | Step 2 | 2012 | Today's AA daily: "I'm not different." And yet inside I considered myself very special and different because I was not like you, the real alcoholic. Looking back, in my early days I didn't want to be like them and I sat in meetings judging other people as they shared their experience, strength and hope of their recovery… I knew I could see why they were alcoholics, and I had yet to admit and accept I was really an alcoholic and so similar to everyone else…



Even now if I don't remind myself that I need to listen to the similarities and not differences when I'm in meetings, I can easily start to judge and think badly about those sharing and equally badly about me not being good enough even as an alcoholic. If I do listen to the similarities and the solutions I start to feel right, as my emotions settle and I can listen to the wisdom being shared. If I feel right, I start to think right and so my actions tend to be focused in the solution rather than judging the problem, and the problem is usually me…



Our societies are not equal because of history and because? It doesn't matter when it comes to recovery, we have the similarity, a desire to be sober one day at a time and work together in unity service and recovery. As we remind ourselves that we are a "Fellowship" and a society of equals, each with our part to play, there is no exclusion by those who understand the real gift of Fellowship and included we all keep sober one day at a time…



It is a beautiful Sunday morning here in London UK, it has been a difficult week with many challenges. Initiating routine medical tests for type I diabetes which includes blood tests, eye tests etc, following up on dental requirements and dealing with the effects of a flu jab. Who would've thought a flu jab would impact so detrimentally I could not function for a few days… But this morning, a blue sky and sunshine, being able to eat food and feel simply okay makes all the difference, and with a meeting I will become closer to being restored to sanity on a daily basis…





DonInLondon 2005-2011



I cannot consider myself “different” in A.A.; if I do I isolate myself from others and from contact with my Higher Power. If I feel isolated in A.A., it is not something for which others are responsible. It is something I’ve created by feeling I’m “different” in some way.



Today two meetings, "Just For Today" this morning all about what is on our minds today. A lot of happiness, a lot of grief all wrapped up together inside each of us. Life is no longer one dimension, so many elements to evoke joy and sadness in every moment, no wonder we get confused!



And tonight, "Courage To Change" where I meet friends from early days, including the chair. Always enjoy sitting with friends and listening, seems we change regardless in recovery, the steps our toolkit, leaning on fellowship and learning gradually that the action is always in the now and we are very human humans...



We are not special and different, we are unique and authentic in our journey ~ John F. Kennedy "When power leads man toward arrogance, poetry reminds him of his limitations. When power narrows the area of man's concern, poetry reminds him of the richness and diversity of existence. When power corrupts, poetry cleanses." Diversity is spiritual, another one of life's rocks..



Fellowship all about the similarities and not the differences ~ Hillary Clinton "What we have to do... is to find a way to celebrate our diversity and debate our differences without fracturing our communities." -/- From the boardroom to the gutter, it did not take me long to get there..



We need respect others and their peaceful living ~ Malcolm Forbes "Diversity: the art of thinking independently together." I can say yes to what is good for me, and with courage say no to that which hinders or is not my path today...



Compare and despair, a key to insanity ~ Edward T. Hall "How man evolved with such an incredible reservoir of talent and such fantastic diversity isn't completely understood... he knows so little and has nothing to measure himself against." Value our outlook, let go what hinders, let in good which works and develop our authenticity..



Courage to be ourselves in our similarities and human endeavour ~ Maya Angelou "It is time for parents to teach young people early on that in diversity there is beauty and there is strength." Acceptance of life today, people places things and the choices we have are ours to explore ..



Ernest Istook ~ "My father was the son of immigrants, and he grew up bilingual, but English is what my father taught me and what he spoke to me. America's strength is not our diversity; it is our ability to unite around common principles even when we come from different backgrounds."



AA Daily Reflection: I'M NOT DIFFERENT ~ FEBRUARY 19, In the beginning, it was four whole years before A.A. brought permanent sobriety to even one alcoholic woman. Like the “high bottoms, ” the women said they were different; . . . The Skid-Rower said he was different . . . so did the artists and the professional people, the rich, the poor, the religious, the agnostic, the Indians and the Eskimos, the veterans, and the prisoners. . . . nowadays all of these, and legions more, soberly talk about how very much alike all of us alcoholics are when we admit that the chips are finally down. AS BILL SEES IT, p. 24



I cannot consider myself “different” in A.A.; if I do I isolate myself from others and from contact with my Higher Power. If I feel isolated in A.A., it is not something for which others are responsible. It is something I’ve created by feeling I’m “different” in some way. Today I practice being just another alcoholic in the worldwide Fellowship of Alcoholics Anonymous.



Step 2 Reading Video Link:





"Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity"

-/-

Saturday 18 February 2012

February 18 | AA 12 Steps In Action | Step 2 | 2012

February 18 | AA 12 Steps In Action | Step 2 | 2012 | Today's AA daily reflection: "picking up the spiritual tool kit." My understanding of spiritual living is acceptance of life on life's terms. If I can cope with the reality of my situation as it is right now, good, bad or indifferent, as long as my feelings fit reality and I know what my feelings are, my thinking and actions are the best they can be right now in this moment…



And if I can feel life as it is, think things through and get help when needed, my actions are likely to lead to a better outcome. The spiritual tool kit, that we have in fellowship contains the twelve steps and the twelve traditions, and especially the experience, strength and hope we share with each other in this one particular day. And the spiritual tool kit may contain all the wisdom we can gather to help us just one day at a time…



And the spiritual experience is always now, reality being lived in the moment. Of course we do develop wisdom which may apply in many given situations, the real key in spiritual is always being open, honest and willing to change as life changes. With our spiritual tool kit, each sober day offers acceptance of what we can do and cannot do and the wisdom to know the difference. We need never be alone and fearful, we can be together with faith and courage as life changes today…





DonInLondon 2005-2011



The nature of our friendships and relationships are always changing. We become close and intimate for a while. We change and they change. We feel deeply and when change happens, we feel loss. Letting go with love is bitter sweet grief, we do cherish always...



"OUR PATHS ARE OUR OWN… there was nothing left for us but to pick up the simple kit of spiritual tools laid at our feet."



To Love Be Loved & Useful just for today..~ Tom Bodett "They say a person needs just three things to be truly happy in this world. Someone to love, something to do, and something to hope for." Hope is key in just one day, keep our expectations real and dreams may become reality in the moment of now..



Hope best experienced in the moment where it translates into reality through action ~ Carl Sandburg "Hope is an echo, hope ties itself yonder, yonder." -/- Yonder without foundation is a rich fantasy, happy imaginings, living in the now we can transform our hopes into living experience on the path of of life..



One Coin or Chip kept close as a reminder, 24 hours is Just One Day ~ Satya Sai Baba "Man's many desires are like the small metal coins he carries about in his pocket. The more he has the more they weight him down." Enough to lighten the heart and let the world guide me to my next step..



Broken hearted, better we know we are heartbroken and face the reality one day at a time ~ Thomas Fuller "If it were not for hopes, the heart would break." Then we learn hope and wisdom combined lead to less heartbreaks and more heartfelt moments..



Hope is facing reality ~ Pliny the Elder "Hope is the pillar that holds up the world. Hope is the dream of a waking man." -/- I hope I feel real life as it is today day...



Daybreak, The Truth of Now, all we need is love, and to be included today ~ Aristotle "Hope is a waking dream." Hello God, universe, world, nature, providence choices just for today...



AA Daily Reflection: OUR PATHS ARE OUR OWN FEBRUARY 18, there was nothing left for us but to pick up the simple kit of spiritual tools laid at our feet. ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 25



My first attempt at the Steps was one of obligation and necessity, which resulted in a deep feeling of discouragement in the face of all those adverbs: courageously; completely; humbly; directly; and only. I considered Bill W. fortunate to have gone through such a major, even sensational, spiritual experience. I had to discover, as time went on, that my path was my own. After a few twenty-four hours in the A.A. Fellowship, thanks especially to the sharing of members in meetings, I understood that everyone gradually finds his or her own pace in moving through the Steps. Through progressive means, I try to live according to these suggested principles. As a result of these Steps, I can say today that my attitude towards life, people, and towards anything having to do with God, has been transformed and improved.



Step 2 Reading Video Link:





"Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity"



-/-






February 17 | AA 12 Steps In Action | Step 2 | 2012

February 17 | AA 12 Steps In Action | Step 2 | 2012 | Today's AA daily reflection: "from fear and punishment to love and acceptance." As the Beatles said in their song, "all we need is love" and this can be very difficult to understand after a long period of near drinking ourselves to death. We have no esteem, the brave face covering up our fears and trepidations and our worthiness to be alive at all…



It takes time to understand what redemption means in recovery, that there is opportunity to redeem ourselves and find what is possible in sober living. Our self reliance and self harm, self loathing and isolation is almost impenetrable in early days. The notion that a power greater than us can help restore us to sanity just for a day is very difficult to accept. Whatever we choose to be a higher power in our lives, needs to be based on love and forgiveness for ourselves and every single person we feel may have wronged us in our journey of life…



As newcomers, we may be impatient to be fixed and as regular members in our fellowship we can be impatient with newcomers. No single human in the context of recovery can assume responsibility for another without the danger of undermining the greater power and wisdom available in the fellowship. The accumulated wisdom of the many sharing experience, strength and hope is more balanced and broad than one single view, including me!





DonInLondon 2005-2011



The next right action is often a combination of all our personal attributes: some believe in God, some do not, and some who believe God exists have no faith and some who do not believe have faith! Fear, a brave face and ego exist in all of us. And courage, faith and confidence too. All these attributes exist and play their part in how we live, useful when in balance and harmful at extremes. Each attribute an asset or liability in our lives today...





We all have our mountains of problems, unravelling them gently with help as each day passes, we stop climbing and start walking the potholed road of happy destiny.. Socrates "If all our misfortunes were laid in one common heap, whence everyone must take an equal portion, most people would be content to take their own and depart." -/-





Problem to solution ~ Edward Hodnett "A good problem statement often includes: (a) what is known, (b) what is unknown, and (c) what is sought." I knew I was being driven mad, I did not know why, I asked for help in a moment of clarity "I cannot do life well on my own.." Fellowship was and is the key



Potholes and puddles on the trudge of destiny are always a part of our happiness overall ~ W. C. Doane "Life has no smooth road for any of us; and in the bracing atmosphere of a high aim the very roughness stimulates the climber to steadier steps till the legend, "over steep ways to the stars," fulfils itself." -/- Without the sad, we could not know happiness and the difference we learn to cherish..



Denial comes before the madness, then the madness keeps us stuck ~ G. K. Chesterton "It isn't that they can't see the solution, it's that they can't see the problem." Ignorance is never bliss...



Embrace everything and ask for help when help is needed ~ Jiddu Krishnamurti "If we can really understand the problem, the answer will come out of it, because the answer is not separate from the problem." -/- Call your sponsor, ask a friend, seek professional help, let go self will, let in experience strength and hope...help is there if we ask the right source at the right time.. Don





Embrace both 6 & 7: Step 6 too much of [overly stuck] brave facing , fear and ego blocks us to; step 7, our need to develop [short on] courage, faith and confidence. Balance in life is always in the day, ~ Ralph J. Bunche "You can surmount the obstacles in your path if you are determined, courageous and hard-working. Never be fainthearted. Be resolute, but never bitter.... Permit no one to dissuade you from pursuing the goals you set for yourselves. Do not fear to pioneer, to venture down new paths of endeavour." -/-



"science" of life, reliance on self determination based on isolated thinking, "art" of life flowing with our feelings and thinking illuminated by our inclusion in the world and openness to learn ~ Bernard M. Baruch "The art of living lies less in eliminating our troubles than in growing with them." -/- 12 steps of providence..



AA Daily Reflection: THE LOVE IN THEIR EYES ~ FEBRUARY 17, Some of us won’t believe in God, others can’t, and still others who do believe that God exists have no faith whatever He will perform this miracle. TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 25



It was the changes I saw in the new people who came into the Fellowship that helped me lose my fear, and change my negative attitude to a positive one. I could see the love in their eyes and I was impressed by how much their “One Day at a Time” sobriety meant to them. They had looked squarely at Step Two and came to believe that a power greater than themselves was restoring them to sanity. That gave me faith in the Fellowship, and hope that it could work for me too. I found that God was a loving God, not that punishing God I feared before coming to A.A. I also found that He had been with me during all those times I had been in trouble before I came to A.A. I know today that He was the one who led me to A.A. and that I am a miracle.

Step 2 Reading Video Link:









"Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity"



-/-





Thursday 16 February 2012

February 16 | AA 12 Steps In Action | Step 2 | 2012

February 16 | AA 12 Steps In Action | Step 2 | 2012 | Today's AA daily reflection: "from tourist and watcher to citizen and worker." With TV reality and talent shows, we watch and judge and similarly we can be observers, rather than doers in our own lives. Addicted to success, judging it in others and not looking at what we do day by day, we can be passive awaiting answers and not knowing the questions. Sober, I am more engaged in "doing" through service and commitment. The quality of life I have today is contingent on me working life and reality and coping with it…Back in the day I became a very good judge of the world around me and could find the good, and equally find fault and for a long time I was a problem solver and decision-maker. And then I lost the plot. In recovery, the gift of engaging and being part of life, being part of the solution and not the problem keeps me on my toes and aware of what I do and not what others do today…



What are the right principles and attitudes? We can only find this out for ourselves and at the same time the principles of unity service and recovery keep me involved and engaged in Fellowship day-to-day. The three attitudes which are espoused in our programme are about being open, honest and willing to change. Open, honest and willing to change is a daily occurrence. The saying "if it ain't broke don't fix it" is not the answer for me, nothing is broken in recovery and nothing needs fixing, we simply keep on changing one day at a time as life changes one day at a time…



And from today's AA a daily reflection, "the wisdom to know the difference" just highlights what we can do and cannot do as the ingredients of life are an ever-changing recipe. What I could do yesterday may not be appropriate today. The solution today can be a problem tomorrow if I'm stuck and unyielding to changing circumstances. As M Scott Peck said, "life is difficult," and if we accept that life is difficult day by day, "difficult" is not the issue, it is how we change and adapt and find the solution in our actions and living today…





DonInLondon 2005-2011



To love, be loved and useful ..~ Erich Fromm "Immature love says "I love you because I need you." Mature love says "I need you because I love you." -/- What is love? Beyond definition always. Love is a feeling...



Love.. either we are all in or all out.. ~ Rollo May "Hate is not the opposite of love; apathy is." My Father, on his death bed said to me, "three words to consider how we treat ourselves and others" We "Cherish" or are "Superficial" and "Indifferent"



Embrace all our feelings and we learn to know them ~ Rollo May "Courage is not the absence of despair; it is, rather, the capacity to move ahead in spite of despair." -/- Back in the Day too much: Fear, Brave Facing, Ego, more in this day: courage, faith and confidence..



Let go, let in the good of now, from conscience, wisdom of others and the truth of now ~ Rollo May "Human freedom involves our capacity to pause, to choose the one response toward which we wish to throw our weight." We do not deserve a particular life, we work at living and choices come..



Panic and Anxiety can make us frantic ~ Rollo May "It is an ironic habit of human beings to run faster when we have lost our way." A steady path and course allow us to increase our pace as we respond from wisdom and not react in blind fear..



AA Daily Reflection: COMMITMENT ~ FEBRUARY 16, Understanding is the key to right principles and attitudes, and right action is the key to good living. TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 125



There came a time in my program of recovery when the third stanza of the Serenity Prayer — “The wisdom to know the difference” –became indelibly imprinted in my mind. From that time on, I had to face the ever-present knowledge that my every action, word and thought was within, or outside, the principles of the program. I could no longer hide behind self-rationalization, nor behind the insanity of my disease. The only course open to me, if I was to attain a joyous life for myself (and subsequently for those I love), was one in which I imposed on myself an effort of commitment, discipline, and responsibility.



Step 2 Reading Video Link:







"Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity"



-/-




Wednesday 15 February 2012

February 15 | AA 12 Steps In Action | Step 2 | 2012

February 15 | AA 12 Steps In Action | Step 2 | 2012 | Today's AA daily reflection: "the AA promises" in my early days make me feel very uneasy, because there had been so many promises by so many people and by me which were broken. And the notion that life would be beyond my wildest dreams made no sense at all. The best promise turned out to be if I listen and learn and can get to bed tonight without a drink, sober I can cope with reality just for a day…



I read out the promises from the big book at a newcomers meeting this week. And I try to read it slowly and clearly, emphasising the words to give them their full meaning. I do know that life today is certainly beyond my wildest dreams. After decades of burying my head in the sand when it came to emotions and anything to do with spiritual, I keep learning just one day at a time where life and freedom of choice can take me realistically day by day. And that is beyond my wildest dreams of back then in the day…



Step two all about being restored to sanity with the help of a higher power. And after a few years of recovery I have found that sanity can be restored on a daily basis, contingent on asking for help and checking out what is going on for me with other people. The greater wisdom of the many, asking myself in good conscience where are my freedoms and what are my choices today? Less fear and more faith, less isolation and more inclusion which helps me develop courage and confidence day by day for one day only, this one…



In the AA Fellowship big book, there is a sentence in chapter five, "rarely have we seen a person fail who has thoroughly followed our path." And the sentence made me feel uneasy in my early days in recovery. First I had to find a path, and then overcome my own self prejudice and my attitudes towards other people and their wisdom in recovery. I was still judging the world and not judging me and my actions. Once on the path of recovery, with help and support within the Fellowship and outside the Fellowship, guidance comes and I am sober one day at a time. I've often seen people fail to thoroughly follow the path. Why? Because it is the opposite of the road most travelled by addicts and alcoholics, the road to hell and certain endings in this world…



With the death of Whitney Houston a few days ago being associated with excesses and addiction to drink and drugs, it does not surprise me that the impact is felt around the world. Our Prime Minister, David Cameron declares another initiative on drunkenness and violence caused by alcohol and drugs. As we learn in recovery, it is neither the amount of drugs and alcohol people take, it is the impact it has on them and their behaviour. If the reality of life today was all that it could be, and that people have realistic expectations in what Mr Cameron described as a fair society or as he put it, "the big society" then people would not resort to misbehaviour and excesses and addiction? My opinion, no one chooses addiction and nobody chooses exclusion from a good society…





DonInLondon 2005-2011



Are these extravagant promises? We think not. They are being fulfilled among us–sometimes quickly, sometimes slowly. They will always materialize if we work for them...



I have found reality to be the greatest gift, the ability to cope with what is going on now in my life as it happens, with less denial and less grief. Clearing the wreckage of the past with forgiveness, with love and humility means I can see today with clarity. I feel right sized and equal right now...



"The Power Of Love"- Maxim Gorky "When one loves somebody, everything is clear - where to go, what to do - it all takes care of itself and one doesn't have to ask anybody about anything." When I am sober, more of life is clear, and in fellowship clarity comes with listening and sharing life on lifes terms..



Learning to learn again in every moment without fear, shame or guilt opens up the doors to a new way of living ~ Robert Frost "Education is the ability to listen to almost anything without losing your temper or your self-confidence." some say "beyond our wildest dreams," for me "now" is no longer my worst fears of being found out..



AA Daily Reflection: TAKING ACTION ~ FEBRUARY 15, Are these extravagant promises? We think not. They are being fulfilled among us–sometimes quickly, sometimes slowly. They will always materialize if we work for them. ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 84



One of the most important things A.A. has given me, in addition to freedom from booze, is the ability to take “right action.” It says the promises will ALWAYS materialize if I WORK for them. Fantasizing about them, debating them, preaching about them and faking them just won’t work. I’ll remain a miserable, rationalizing dry drunk. By taking action and working the Twelve Steps in all my affairs, I’ll have a life beyond my wildest dreams.



Step 2 Reading Video Link:







"Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity"



-/-



Tuesday 14 February 2012

February 14 | AA 12 Steps In Action | Step 2 | 2012

February 14 | AA 12 Steps In Action | Step 2 | 2012 | Today's AA daily reflection: "expectations versus demands" and as is often said in Fellowship, "expectations are resentments under construction." This does not mean that we lose sight of aspirations and ambition, it simply means we are more realistic about what we can and cannot do. And we concentrate and live in the present moment, striving and trudging the happy or sad, loving and sometimes painful road of destiny…



I met a friend yesterday as I was leaving hospital after some tests which needed to be done, routine tests and not worrying tests. An impromptu meeting of minds as we were both concerned about newcomers we have been supporting over the last few days. Both of us wanted to be the best we could be for the newcomer and both newcomers had somehow managed to escape us and our good deeds… We accepted the situation and left the door open to support and help if the newcomers chose and that was what they wanted…



A Fellowship meeting mid-morning, a newcomers meeting. A wonderful chair by someone I know sharing just how it was in the malady of drink and what it was like now in recovery some years on. The chair all about realistic living today and not about what they thought life ought to be and what they deserved. The expectation was life would be difficult sober and the experience of living reality must be cherished as people are to be cherished and not treated with superficiality and indifference…



I had a couple of "AA chips" in my pocket, just for today chips and gave them to two newcomers in the meeting. On one side of the chip it says "one day at a time" and on the other side, the serenity prayer. I can often forget just how valuable it was to receive a token and reminder in the form of an "AA chip" and what it meant to me. It meant I need simply be sober today and I would learn what I can do and what I cannot do just for this one day…



"Trust God and clean house" often made me feel that I was a second-class citizen, because I had no concept of God or higher power. It seemed like I could stumble on the first two steps of the twelve step program. When I looked at it in a slightly different way, "trust in the good and support I get from other people and learn what it means to clean house on a daily basis" I began a journey of progress and not perfection…



DonInLondon 2005-2011



Powerless over people places and things can drive us mad! Sigmund Freud Every normal person, in fact, is only normal on the average. His ego approximates to that of the psychotic in some part or other and to a greater or lesser extent. -/- Resentments and anger are dubious luxuries for everyone



Desiderata ~ "Therefore be at peace with God, whatever you conceive Him to be, and whatever your labors and aspirations, in the noisy confusion of life, keep peace in your soul." "Burn the idea into the consciousness of every man that he can get well regardless of anyone. The only condition is that he trust in God and clean house." ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 98 ~ Dealing with expectations is a frequent topic at meetings! Expectations are resentments under construction. I have heard and said this many times. Every morning I set my expectations to zero, so I may feel okay by the progress I make today in any or every endeavour...



"Lest we forget" at Flood St. The reading was the "spiritual experience" followed by a great chair. What is spiritual? "A dose of reality," or "the ability to cope with today." It may involve faith, God, or as simple as seeing the truth right now. Spiritual is unique and authentic as life is, living the truth, coping with reality and finding serenity in the moment. We work with what works today...



AA Daily Reflection: AA Daily Reflection: EXPECTATIONS vs. DEMANDS FEBRUARY 14, Burn the idea into the consciousness of every man that he can get well regardless of anyone. The only condition is that he trust in God and clean house. ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 98



Dealing with expectations is a frequent topic at meetings. It isn’t wrong to expect progress of myself, good things from life, or decent treatment from others. Where I get into trouble is when my expectations become demands. I will fall short of what I wish to be and situations will go in ways I do not like, because people will let me down sometimes. The only question is: “What am I going to about it?” Wallow in self-pity or anger; retaliate and make a bad situation worse; or will I trust in God’s power to bring blessings on the messes in which I find myself? Will I ask Him what I should be learning; do I keep on doing the right things I know how to do, no matter what; do I take the time to share my faith and blessings with others?



Step 2 Reading Video Link:







"Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity"



-/-


Monday 13 February 2012

February 13 | AA 12 Steps In Action | Step 2 | 2012

February 13 | AA 12 Steps In Action | Step 2 | 2012 | Today's AA daily reflection: "we cannot think our way sober." For me it is the difference between thinking and knowing versus actually doing and living sober. I read the books, thought I knew it all and I don't, and waited. I needed to wait for life experiences which meant I could see my old behaviour and my need to change my behaviour as the steps and traditions could be utilised in real life… It was not long before I could see how each step and tradition helped me with my feelings and actions on a daily basis…



Clearly the school of hard knocks and the University of life provides every experience to test and challenge how we can keep sober and live the steps and traditions in our lives. Never perfect, simply progress today and the joy of understanding what my feelings are, rather than thinking what they ought to be was a revelation almost from day one. My first feeling, not pushed away by alcohol was almost paralysing, it was fear. And with the passing of each anxiety state, the fear kept on diminishing to fit reality.



It seemed like I had put the cart before the horse, my thinking had been a fantasy of what I ought to be able to do. As my feelings and emotions started to settle down, I realised if I knew how I was feeling on a daily basis and in the moment, my thinking would be the right size for the day and that moment. Then my actions were more in keeping with the reality of what is happening and not trying to think of myself bigger or smaller than the problems and solutions on that day…



And now, I realise just as I did not think my way into being an alcoholic, it is not thinking which comes first in keeping sober. Knowing how I feel, will always show me the way. Extremes of emotion which do not fit with reality will always lead to overthinking the situation and the actions being extreme and will not help me cope with reality as it is. I really didn't understand my feelings and emotions because I was only half complete. I now know that I can feel anything dependent on my spiritual condition. And as described by an archbishop and probably many other religious and secular "emotional and intellectual scholars," "spiritual living is the ability to cope with what is going on now."



This does not mean we abandon our thinking completely or ignore what we have learned over the years. We need to put the horse before the cart, know our emotional state and how it impacts on our thinking or we keep on doing the same old things expecting a different result which is Einstein's definition of insanity…





Step 2 Reading Video Link:





"Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity"



DonInLondon 2005-2011



"Even the most brilliant mind is no defense against the disease of alcoholism. I can’t think my way sober." As Bill Sees it



Two meetings, lunchtime at the "hut" for spiritual experiences and traditions. Wonderful chair, all about reality. We can live reality today without the need to take the edge off. Gifts in recovery, getting to know ourselves and those we love. Sometimes just in time, we realise just how much we care for family and make amends before it is too late.



And then "after nines" at Eaton square, all about later sobriety. The good news in later sobriety is to live the days and not rely on years, that we still get into scrapes, fall into holes, bits may drop off us! Same as everyone who keeps on living. And always newcomers looked after in this meeting in a caring way, and similarities and not differences emphasised all the way...



AA Daily: WE CAN'T THINK OUR WAY SOBER ~ FEBRUARY 13 To the intellectually self-sufficient man or woman, many A.A.’s can say, “Yes, we were like you–far too smart for our own good…. Secretly, we felt we could float above the rest of the folks on our brain power alone.” AS BILL SEES IT, p. 60



Even the most brilliant mind is no defense against the disease of alcoholism. I can’t think my way sober. I try to remember that intelligence is a God-given attribute that I may use, a joy–like having a talent for dancing or drawing or carpentry. It does not make me better than anyone else, and it is not a particularly reliable tool for recovery, for it is a power greater than myself who will restore me to sanity–not a high IQ or a college degree.



-/-

Sunday 12 February 2012

February 12 | AA 12 Steps In Action | Step 2 | 2012

February 12 | AA 12 Steps In Action | Step 2 | 2012 | Today's AA daily reflection: "the root of our troubles" selfishness and self-centredness! When do we realise that we have been selfish and self-centred? Most likely a question to be asked, every day in our personal conduct. When it comes to recognising selfish and self-centred in relation to our addiction, it is almost impossible to see with any clarity. From ignorance of our condition, to denial and then to admit and accept takes time when it comes to changing our outlook day by day…



I was just watching a TV programme all about rules, laws and regulations which apply in different forms of religion. Our Fellowship, Alcoholics Anonymous is not a religious organisation, but many fellows in our society do hold religious views. I'm grateful for the early founders of our Fellowship who suggested there are no rules, laws or regulations which exclude anyone anywhere reaching out the help. There are suggestions about how we conduct ourselves in Fellowship and it always remains a personal decision about what we can do and cannot do today…



The twelve steps and the twelve traditions. Steps for personal development, open honest and willing to change. Traditions for unity service and recovery. The steps to stop us committing suicide, the traditions to stop us committing homicide. All about tolerance and love for other people and compassion as we learn together sharing experience strength and hope. This is why Fellowship works for me, not selfish and not self-centred as people when it comes to sharing a message on learning how to live life again and again and again…



I do realise over the years that bravado covered up my shortcomings. My shortcomings, not understanding the nature of faith (simple faith rather than religious faith), courage and confidence to meet real-life, that is life on life's terms and not some fiction I had thought up. Today I do have courage, faith and confidence based on what I know and the ability to keep on learning how life may be today. I can be a part of society and included contingent on my understanding that life is changing and I can be part of reality today…





Step 2 Reading Video Link:







"Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity"



DonInLondon 2005-2011



Selfishness–self-centeredness! That, we think, is the root of all our troubles



Two meetings in a day: First meeting: "Just for today" this morning, we were packed in like sardines! Newcomers to old timers, sober today. People sharing what is happening now, the themes were all about what was disturbing us in the moment, good things and bad things and as always acceptance seemed to be the key. It is the key if we can find it!



And Second meeting: Tonight was "courage to change." We can and do change every day. Experience is our teacher, not just our own, but the experience everyone shares. Practice makes progress and perfection is not our goal. Our goal is understanding what we can do and what we cannot do and simply learning the difference...



AA Daily: THE ROOT OF OUR TROUBLES ~ FEBRUARY 12, Selfishness–self-centeredness! That, we think, is the root of all our troubles. ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 62



How amazing the revelation that the world, and everyone in it, can get along just fine with or without me. What a relief to know that people, places and things will be perfectly okay without my control and direction. And how wordlessly wonderful to come to believe that a power greater than me exists separate and apart from myself. I believe that the feeling of separation I experience between me and God will one day vanish. In the meantime, faith must serve as the pathway to the center of my life.



-/-